Renewal of marriage vows on wedding anniversaries

The renewal of marriage vows on wedding anniversaries is a traditional practice of the Christian family, recommended by the Rituale Romanum and by the Ordo Celebrandi Matrimonium of St Paul VI (19.03.1969, 2nd typical edition 1991, n. 122 — Blessing of spouses on anniversaries). It has doctrinal foundation in the character of the marital covenant defined by the Council of Trent (Session XXIV, 11.11.1563) and developed in Familiaris Consortio n. 13 (JPII, 22.11.1981) as «covenant of conjugal love by which a man and a woman give and receive themselves mutually». The renewal has three pastorally recognised purposes: (1) memorial of the sacramental grace received on the day of the wedding — which continues to operate in the spouses as a permanent source of sanctification; (2) reparation for daily infidelities, impatient words, forgotten tenderness, omissions in the duties of state; (3) anticipation of the arrival at eternity, where the human covenant ceases as a bond (Mt 22:30) but remains as a history of salvation lived together. It is recommended to solemnise it on significant anniversaries (10, 25 silver, 50 gold, 60 diamond) or simply every year on the wedding anniversary. It can be done at home before a lit candle and a crucifix, or at the Votive Mass of Christian Spouses with the blessing of the parish priest. Linked to Saints Louis and Zélie Martin (joint canonisation 18.10.2015), parents of St Thérèse of the Child Jesus, models par excellence of daily conjugal fidelity.

(The spouses stand before a lit candle, the Crucifix or an image of the Holy Family. They pray together:)

Lord Jesus Christ, who were present at the wedding of Cana (Jn 2:1-11), who by your coming elevated marriage to the dignity of a Sacrament (Trent Session XXIV), and who continue today, here, in our house, to pour upon us the grace which we received on the day when we gave ourselves to each other — on this wedding anniversary, we want before you and before each other to renew the promises we solemnly made.

(The spouses turn to each other, take each other’s right hand and say alternately — first the husband, then the wife:)

«I, [name], renew today before God and before you, [name of spouse], the promise I made to you on the day of our wedding: I promise to be faithful to you, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, all the days of my life — to love you and respect you until death do us part.»

(Then, together:)

Lord God, receive the renewal of these our promises. We ask you:

• For grateful memorial of the years lived together — thanks for each day in which you have sustained our covenant despite our weaknesses; thanks for the children you have entrusted to us (if any); thanks for the crosses we have carried together and which have united us more to your Heart;
• For humble reparation of infidelities — forgive us the impatient words, the hard silences, the forgetting of love, the omissions in the duties of state, the ungrateful comparisons, all the moments when we did not honour you in the face of the other;
• For perseverance in the days which still remain to us — sustain us in fidelity until the last day, give us the grace of a good death together or one after the other, but always in your friendship, and the firm hope of meeting again in eternal life in your presence and in the presence of all the saints.

Through the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary of the Wedding of Cana, of the holy spouses of the Old Testament (Tobias and Sarah, Aquila and Priscilla), and in particular of Saints Louis and Zélie Martin — parents of St Thérèse of the Child Jesus — protectors of the Christian family, help us to persevere.

Our Father… Hail Mary… Glory be…

(Spouses may end with a kiss of peace, sensible sign of the renewal of the covenant.)